April 23, 2014



its impossible to watch this and be sad

i just watched this like 9 times.

(via eternaldelirium)

April 23, 2014
That awkward Fibro moment…

When you pain medication gives you extreme insomnia.

April 23, 2014
Me while meditating

Me while meditating

(Source: earcandyupdate)

April 23, 2014
When someone asks me how I feel about fibro


April 22, 2014



It sucks. It’s hard to explain. Sometimes I’m just happy to know that I’m not just making it up in my mind and if you have it too you probably know what I mean. If you don’t I can’t explain it.

You summed it up quite nicely.

(via dearworldletshavefun)

April 22, 2014










I don’t have chronic pain but this artwork is so nice to look at *^*

Just because we’re not writhing on the floor doesn’t mean we’re not hurting. We’ve just gotten really good at hiding it and functioning with it, otherwise we’d literally starve in our beds.

This hits a bit too close to home.

Something I’ve been trying to explain to my parents and they just don’t get it.

My kid was shocked to hear how much I hurt all the time, because yes - you get good at not showing it

This is a great representation of what I live with

The accuracy, it hurts me.

You never let them see it and then when you have a really bad day and you’re barely functioning you get called dramatic.

This is the best way to show how my day goes. I love it!

The most accurate thing ever.

(Source: screwconsciousnessblog)

April 21, 2014

I have fibromyalgia. Or at least that is what my doctor is telling me. I better have something. After two years of endless pain, IBS, numbness everywhere, headaches, fatigue, and ruined social plans, I better have something. 

The worst part of all of this is my blood tests show I am perfectly healthy, almost to a fault. And yet, I have endless pain that keeps me from being happy or able to do normal things. How can this be?

When my doctor told me I have fibromyalgia, I started to cry in his office. Not because it is a scary diagnosis like cancer, but because this basically means there isn’t really anything anyone will do for you. My mother has FMS as well and while she has been a big help with telling me that she has experienced the same issues I am, I still can’t help but go online and see that there is almost nothing real that can be done about FMS. 

The issue is that many people, including many disabilities agencies, don’t believe that FMS is a real thing, and why would they? The name itself is a “syndrome” not disease. While it is recognized by the CDC, I am careful who I tell that I have this since it seems to be one of those things that people think is “all in your head.” This pisses me off. If I wanted something to be in my head it would be the ability to run the marathons I want, swim where I want, eat whatever I want without being sick after, and keep up with my friends who are my same age. Oh yeah, I am  only 27, which for normal women means heels everyday or when you go out. But since I have this, I am limited to old lady heels and only for a limited amount of time. As it is, typing this post is making my hands hurt, something that happens all the time. 

Currently my doctor is also testing me for Lupus since many of my symptoms line up with the lupus symptoms and three members of my family have lupus. So far, nothing shows it is lupus. 

Since I work at Starbucks it has been stated by my peers, family, and doctor that I should take a leave of absence in order to gain rest and relax so that my body can restore its energy. Makes sense since the last four years of my life have been filled with so much stress it should have landed me in a mental hospital, not a medical break. A month is what was given and while I am going to try to take advantage of the time to rest, relax, exercise and start tai chi, I can’t help but stress out about what is going to happen when I start my career soon. Will I be able to keep up? Am I going to have to settle with some job I don’t want?

Bottom line, this is following my journey. I have looked at alot of sites online about FMS and have encountered that there are two different types of patients, neither of which I have fit into; the middle aged women with familes who are trying to deal with symptoms and the young patients who don’t really work and are taking large amount of pills and supplements. I work almost 40 hours a week, well except on leave, on my feet, am young and try to limit my medication. I tried all the medication they gave me and the side effects were worst than the FMS sometimes or only intensified the symptoms. 

So if there is anyone out there like me, please follow along with me or share  your experiences, treatment, secrets.